lie for a reason

you know there's not really much anyone can say...
i've heard all the typical things you would say to someone-

"it gets better",
"give it time",
"you deserve better" etc...

to be honest nothing helps...
even if it's happened to you,
we can't compare ourselves...
love between two people is different,

so heart break between two people is different...
how it feels to you is different...

it's been some time and my wound still feels fresh,
it still feels like i have a gaping hole in my chest...
i still think about that everyday, every minute, every second....
and the scary thing is i actually believe that i will never get over her...

her is and will always will be my part,
the one i fell so hard for i lost myself in the process...
and rotated my life around her..

but what i remember the most was the feeling,
that she was different than anyone i'd met before...
for awhile after that night we talked, got to know each other,

became more than friends,
but being young and so naive our 'relationship' wasn't real...
the next time we talked to each other would be at a friends party and from then on,

she was about to be everything to me...

i fell in love with her...
i didn't even know what love was but i think i figured it out,
that feeling took me awhile to name but i felt it...

we shared everything,
we shared the best parts of our teenage years,
and now being forced into adulthood we've changed...

she said he needs to figure out who she is and i'm stopping her.
i've blamed myself,
i still do...
i'm full of so much regret and guilt and it never goes away...
i still there,
we talk and im not going to lie and say we haven't had those nights before...

the sad thing is i still
remember her far away~~

although i know you're supposed to distance yourself to try to move on,
i can't..
i'm holding on to her with everything i have...
you can call me naive and too young but to me love doesn't have an age restriction...

p/s: ..............................